Monday, February 16, 2015

Progress 1 push at a time

In order to be a successful patient, one must learn patience first. Patience is something I struggle with daily. A good chunk of me just wants this to be over so I can move on.

However, I must remember that it's not my timing but God's. When I try to sprint too quickly, I end up in trouble.

The same goes if I go by my own rules. I am slowly learning to let go of my stubbornness, at east the bad form of it.

In a evaluation today I was hoping for some good news. I wasn't expecting to hear that I have come quite a distance from where I was in certain areas. I also get to start another form of therapy Wednesday.

 Please pray for all who work with me. I know it is not an easy job.

I also was reminded that my brain was still injured. This form of injury takes quite a bit of time to heal, if I do everything correctly. I know I won't but I won't stop trying.

I am constantly reminded, although better, that my processing unit in my brain is malfunctioning. My occipital lobe took one too many hits.

This means that my natural filter is broken allowing an extreme amount of visual information to flood in. I call it "eye hell"

As I look at the computer right now, or any computer, I can visibly see the lines of the screen as it refreshes. It's like my brain is taking snapshots on a high speed camera and I am seeing almost every detail.

This is both annoying and overwhelming. My brain reaches a tipping point several times a day and if I don't shut down for a while, I crash for more than a day, most often 2 or more.

This is written in this format to show you what my brain can handle. I have learned to block out the screen except for a few lines at a time when typing.

That's all I can handle for now. More to come another day or another moment 

1 comment: